The gout continues to grip my feet. This time it was caused by a combination of beer, coffee, stress, and a large microwave that landed on my right foot. Instead of going after the big toe, like gout usually does, it went after the entire right hand side of my foot. I'll have pics to post soon, but they are kind of gross. This definitely doesn't fit into the whole food theme I have been using.

BTW, you can get more info on gout here.

The crazy things you people search for. I recently checked the site stats to see who has been dropping by my humble abode and how they came about setting foot here. Take, for example the person from Pande India who came here for the sambar recipe. I'm pretty sure there is a closer resource for that person considering the recipe is from that person's country. Gotta love the internet.

The strangest hit I've received in recent memory came from Iran although I can't seem to find it in the logs. That person googled "lips" in the arabic version of google and it hit here. Hopefully that person was looking for the chicken lips recipe and nothing else.

My heart goes out to the person from Atlanta, GA who came here looking for a mostaccioli recipe. GAH! Save yourself from the traditional St. Louis wedding side dish! No proper wedding in St. Louis can be complete without a steam table buffet of a tossed salad, non descript white rolls, green beans with pearl onions and bacon, mostaccioli, carved turkey in juice, and carved roast beast in juice. The only beer served will also be Bud Light and Busch exclusively.

You can always tell a native St. Louisian because they will say musk-a-cholie.

spice rubbed pork tenderloin steaks with honey-chipotle sauce

This is my adaptation from the recipe in the May 2006 issue of Fine Cooking. I added a few different spices but it is pretty close to the recipe from the magazine. This stuff is good!

2 large pork tenderloins
1 tsp kosher salt
1 tsp chili powder
1 tsp garlic powder
1 tsp paprika
1 tsp ground cumin
1 tsp ground black pepper
2 tsp brown sugar
1/2 cp honey
1/4 cp apple cider vinegar
1 small can tomato paste
1 chipotle
2 tbsp adobo sauce
1 tbsp dijon mustard

Trim the pork of all visible fat and slice on the diagonal into one inch steaks. Take something big and heavy and proceed to beat the stuffing out of it until the pork is between 1/4 and 1/2 inch thick and much wider. Once all of the pork has been beaten into submission, combine the chili powder, garlic, paprika, cumin, black pepper, and sugar. Rub the spice mixture on as you would ribs and seal in a plastic bag. Refrigerate for several hours.

Prepare a very hot charcoal fire and add a few apple wood chunks if you are feeling like a party. Grill/smoke the pork for three minutes on one side, flip, and grill again for three minutes. Test for doneness. You want to pull it off the grill when they reach 140F. Transfer to a serving dish and cover for five minutes so the juices redistribute.

While all of that is going on, add the remaining ingredients to a food processor and blend until smooth. Pour into a bowl and serve the tenderloin steaks with the chipotle-honey sauce drizzled on top.

Serve with a classic american red potato salad or a memphis style cole slaw. Chase it down with some freshly cut wedges of watermelon.

It was a fun weekend. I saw Grant's Farm, called 911, and fell down the stairs while holding a mount-over-the range microwave. I grew up in STL and I've never seen Grant's Farm. There were many times that I drove by on the way to the Affton Ice Rink. The place is really pretty neat. You have to take a mandatory ride on the tram through the middle of no where to get to the main show. There you can feed the goats, see the eagles, smell the elephants or be immersed in any other exercise that will stimulate the five senses. There's also the free beer since this whole place has been built on beer money. I tried the new seasonal summer beer, Beach Bum Blonde Ale, and it was 10:30 in the morning. Ugh.

I also called nine-eleven this weekend again. Some guy who has a child who is two to three years old came to Disfunctional Court to get the kid. The woman, who recently held the Baby Daddy and child hostage with a shotgun, tried to keep the man from taking his kid home. Did I mention he has custody? She also apparently drove off at high speeds up the street with him hanging out of the door. He grabbed the kid seat, with kid in it, and rolled out of the car.

She tried to keep him from getting into his car and going home. At one point she grabbed the tot and ran off. That's when the dispatcher ended our call and sent out the calvalry. I do believe, after pleading his case, the Daddy went home with the child. I only hope that kid has a better chance in life. To see your dad and your mom go to the point of hitting each other is something that should not have to be seen by such an impressionable youth. My thoughts have been with that little guy since then.

I also fell down the stairs this weekend. I was carrying the microwave downstairs because it had been in the garage for a while and was starting to accumulate dirt. We need to mount it over the oven, but I lack the skills to do so. While carrying the beast down the stairs I guess I lost my step and ended up bouncing down a few stairs until I hit the bottom. I don't really know what happened during the fall. The only thing I really know for sure is that I landed with my left foot up by my left ear and a big microwave was on top of me. I have a few bruises and it hurt when I initially landed. However, I did manage to keep the microwave off the walls some how. Go me. It wasn't as bad as the time a 23 cubic fot fridge fell on me while I was working in the warehouse at Circut City.

I also talked to the market master at Clayton's Farmer's Market. She had put together a series of cooking demostrations at a local joint, but it seems like they still haven't signed the contract. I really hope they do because SuperWife wants to sign me up for one of the classes and it is world class. Chef Gerard Craft- Niche.

It work related news it looks like I will probably be out of a job within the next two months because all new work is being sent elsewhere. It's been a long time since I've felt the need to join the job hunt. What fun.

I have a problem with cookbooks. I went to the local library branch during lunch today in order to find a book I had been waiting on. The book didn't really look as good as I thought it was going to be so I put it back on the shelf. That's when the problem started. I ended up walking out with three other cookbooks I don't have time to read and will probably just return unread. Why? Because I have to have food info at my disposal at all moments.

There are four cookbooks on my desk and only one related to work.

It's been one whale of a week. I worked longer and harder on something than I cared to and made little progress.

We took the Munchkins out for ice cream on Saturday night. We surprised them after dinner with a trip to Fritz's Frozen Custard. The girl working the window misunderstood our order so we ended up with three things of frozen custard. Meaghan tried to eat her whole thing. Boo at hers so fast that she appeared to have headaches several times. Did that stop her? Nope! She carried on like a trooper and licked the spoon clean. That was right before the thunderstorms rolled in.

There's a rule in our neighborhood. It's not really a storm unless our house has damage. Last year we lost a big bradford pear tree and parts of another tree. Let's call that second tree "Lucky". Later that fall we lost parts of the fence, some siding, and all of the kids' toys flew across the yard. My grill took flight and incurred over a hundred dollars in damages. The smoker also flew and while it still works it looks all bent up.

This spring we have again lost sections of the fence and one gate was torn off. On Saturday night we had one bad storm after another pass over the homestead. In the morning I checked to see the damage to the back yard and fence. Nothing was out of place. Hmmm. That's strange. I looked out the window and, sure enough, there was the damage. Lucky took a strike to one of the limbs that had been cut off last August when the bradford pear hit it. The lightning peeled off a section five inches wide by seven feet long. There are now pieces of wood up to fifty feet away. I can only imagine seeing it in action.

That one strike took out the dsl modem, phone, and probably the DVR. I still think the satellite dishes took a hit as well, but I can't get up there to check. Maybe I'll climb up there. I need to get the wood off the roof anyway.

In other news, Boo sang every word to twinkle twinkle little star on Sunday and Meaghan's grammar continues to be better than her dad's.